Church Unforced by Kelley Barton

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.
Matthew 11:28-30 The Message

We hear from our leaders, and it is stated on the City Church of Long Beach website, that this faith community’s values are:

Jesus-y

Awkward

Better Together

Unforced

This week I have been thinking about the Unforced value. Below is what popped up in a google search of the word “unforced”.

General Definition: Unforced means something that is done, caused, or expressed naturally without coercion, pressure, or artificial strain.

Natural and Spontaneous: Happening or delivered with ease, without force, tension, or pretense.

Voluntary / Uncoerced: Done by choice or free will, without being forced or pressured by another person or external force.

Here are some very simple ways I have experienced, and benefited, from those who embody this Unforced value.

If I have not been to church in a while, and I show up, no one asks me “Where have you been?” If I come alone, and my spouse or partner stays home, no one asks me “Where is your spouse?”

Those seems like normal, neutral questions, don’t they? So why not ask?

For those who have come out of faith communities that had high expectations of attendance and participation, those questions stir up feelings that are hard to ignore. “Where have you been?” feels like it has an undercurrent or hidden meaning of “why have you missed so many Sundays?”

“Where is your partner?” feels like “why has she missed?”, or “is there a problem in your relationship?”, or even “are you unequally yoked?” (a verse used to imply one of you is more spiritual than the other).

That is one aspect of how an Unforced value manifests at City Church.

There are others – financial giving, participating in small groups, activities, or the tasks that keeps things running (setup, tear down, kids and youth ministries). You may have noticed that City Church mentions all the things I’ve listed in the service and in the digital handout email that goes out weekly. But that is where it ends. There is no subtle or direct manipulation to get more money, more participation, which can result in a person doing something they don’t want to, or have the capacity for, just go avoid the bad feelings that result from ignoring “the call”. It means leadership is trusting that all will work out as God intends, and not pushing to meet, or force, a human set goal. It means flexibility to work with what we have and to keep our focus off goals and on people.

What is the overall result of this Unforced Value? We hope a healthier and shame free group of people coming together to be Jesus-y, awkward and better together.