Love, Happiness & “Enough”

Yesterday we started talking about the psychological concept of “miswanting” - that in life’s game of “would you rather,” we’re unfortunately not very good at making choices that move us toward real happiness or overall wellness.

One of the big places where we “miswant” is how we think about money and “awesome stuff.” Here’s a diagram that illustrates what we think the relationship between happiness and more money/stuff looks like:

More, more, more!

We think more is better. The more we have, the happier we’ll be. In the chat for Sunday’s service, we talked about more chocolate, more french fries, more Netflix…  It could be bigger bank accounts, trendier clothes, up to date devices. In various studies, people who made $50,000 a year were asked how much money they’d need to make to be happy.  $100,000 a year was the average answer. Of course, then they asked those making $100,000 a year, and their answer was $200,000 a year. And on and on it goes.

Here’s what the actual relationship between happiness and $/stuff looks like:

When do we have enough?

Absolutely, there’s a space on the left side of the diagram where more money increases our well being. It means we can pay the rent, buy groceries without worry, even enjoy some comforts and small luxuries like a birthday dinner celebration! But there’s also a big space on the right where more money actually works against our happiness. We keep going after more, trying to regain that magical left side feeling… And really what we need to get back there is less.

Friends, this isn’t just about individual happiness. There are collective implications to these things, too. Consider this wisdom from the book of 1 John:

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person?  Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. - 1 John 3:16-18

Do we want to love, not just in words, but in action, out loud and in public - in other words, through the doing of justice*?   There are people on the far left side of the diagram who need what the people on the far right are hoarding too much of.

Where do you find comfort in this truth today, that God sees you in your need? Where do you find healthy challenge, God inviting you to become more whole?  Spend a few minutes talking with Jesus about what you sense stirring within you.

*Playing off Cornel West’s powerful definition.