Sharing our Affirming Faith with Care by Kelley Barton and Bryce Gutierrez

NOTE: “we” is used instead of “I” since we co-authored this piece

Our series on Blessed Are The Question Askers tackled how to read the Bible as LGBTQ affirming last Sunday. For some it was the beginning of exploring whether they can embrace an affirming stance. For others it was providing scripture validation for a position already held.  And for some, they are still trying to figure this all out.

Most think the word “affirming” applies to our LGBTQ community and that we see them as fully loved by God, an integral part of our faith communities that, in the past, have revolved around the cishet (cis-gender and hetero) Christians. For the purposes of this Reflection, we would suggest that we expand the use of affirming to include all people outside the white, middle to upper class construct, which means including those marginalized by our culture that are not LGBTQ.

For those who have embraced a faith that is affirming, if you are at all like us, you want to share the beauty you have experienced that comes from an affirming faith. The more we share, hopefully the more others might join with us.

We have come to realize that, while well intentioned, the way we share the affirming aspect of our faith can be harmful. We could go about it in a way that suggests a superiority of belief. That our way is the better, kinder, way. That it reflects Jesus more. Do we believe that? Most likely we are leaning that direction. It is human nature to think a belief that one has settled on probably is the best choice. Why else would we have come to that conclusion?  

The evangelical drive to convince others that they should believe what you believe can be damaging to personal relationships and is based upon a flawed idea of “correct Biblical understanding”. Most of us have experienced this and have scars that remind us what it feels like on the receiving end.

We suggest that the journey of deconstruction should not end with adopting a different set of rigid religious beliefs, even an affirming belief. Rather it may require acceptance of the uncomfortable reality that nobody has a complete understanding of God and that there will always be questions and uncertainty?

Let that sit for a bit. It might be uncomfortable to think about, but does it ring true?

The Gospel must be true for all people, in all places, and at all times. The way we engage with those who believe differently than we do should be done humbly, with this in mind. It might not be easy, and we often won’t get it right. But we feel it is worth a try. Do you?